dat RING

Monday, April 6, 2015


{photo credit: me}

i'm engaged!! it's awesome and crazy and unreal (in the best way) and happy and sappy and exciting. and about a million other things. it's been almost a month since dan asked me to marry him. we were hiking in the north carolinas mountains and took a rest on a fallen tree. he told me it was time for a snack, and i got really excited because me and snacks be real tight. i saw him grab something out of his bag and then he climbed up next to me and there we sat side by side. he looked at me and said some really beautiful, wonderful things that i can't recall for the life of me, (that thing they say about everything being a blur during moments like this is true) and then the words "will you marry me?" landed on my ears. "yes yes yessssss."

dan is my encourager, supporter, spiritual leader, partner, adventure buddy, and best friend. he listens to me, is patient with me, and make me laugh. he knows i like to be silly and acts goofy with me on the reg. he loves the Lord and encourages me in my walk with Jesus.

when dan and i first started dating i told him i had a a "four seasons rule". basically, i wanted to date for a minimum of one year before taking any further steps. i would recommend that rule to anyone (although i know a lot of people who have dated for a lot less time who have wonderful, thriving marriages). to be honest, i had a lot of fears about marriage that i had been harboring for a long time. fears that started small and grew into big walls. fears that sat dormant because there was no pressing reason to have to work through them. dan became that reason. in him, i saw potential that i had never seen in anyone else. dan was encouraging when i told him i wanted to see a counselor about my fears. he supported my decision to work through the insecurities i had about marriage. we read through books together, shared many conversations and prayers, and talked through these issues with trusted friends and family.

it has been an incredible thing (to say the least) to see how the Lord has worked in my heart and mind about what marriage is and what it isn't. i think our culture has this mostly backwards. marriage is not simply the pinnacle of a romantic relationship. it is not for our personal happiness and fulfillment. it is not our end all be all. it does not fade into a fuzzy happily ever after, after the words "i do". marriage is to make us holy. marriage is to inspire us to love our spouse like Christ has loved us. marriage helps us take our eyes off our own self-centered mindset and rework our brains to think of someone else.

when you look at marriage that way, it changes everything i think! for me, the pressure lifted and i am excited as i think about my future with dan. i think we make a good team. and a cute one, too!

we are slowly but surely starting to plan for our october wedding. yes, this october. (everyone seems shocked that we are only giving ourselves 6 months?) some of it stresses me out, some of it excites me. i think i will be more than ready for the big day come october. let's get this party started already!

any of you married peeps have any wedding planning advice for this newb? what to do/what not to do? do share!
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