reading list

{photo credit and graphic text: me}

one of my goals this year has been to read one book every month. that may not seem like very much to some of you, but given the amount of free time i have throughout my weeks (sometimes quite a bit, sometimes not a free moment), it has been the perfect amount. i'm not really limiting it to one book exactly, but that is my minimum goal.

it is so satisfying to finally point to books on my bookshelf and say "read that". it's the fourth month into the year, and so far, so good! (i did finish march's book on april 2nd, but i'm still counting it since i read the majority of it during march. i make the rules.)

while i do have a good amount of books that i already own that i want to read, do you guys have any suggestions for me? anything you've read lately that has stood out to you? do you lean towards fiction or non-fiction generally?

here are a few of the books i am currently reading or want to read this year:

tell the wolves i'm home : carol rifka brunt

the day i ate whatever i wanted : elizabeth berg

evolving in monkey town : rachel held evans

a million little ways: uncover the art you were made to live : emily freeman

in the grip of grace : max lucado

the book thief : markus zusak

the ghost at the table : suzanne berne

please share any suggestions you have for me! i trust your judgement. you're a wicked cool and smart bunch.

evolving in monkey town

{photo credit}

welcome to the last installment of the christmas books posts. you can read about my first book here and my second book here.

evolving in monkey town by rachel held evans

one of the beautiful things about my faith (christianity) is that it gives me room to doubt. when this realization came to me, instead of making me feel discouraged, it did quite the opposite. it gave me wings. i have a faith that is big and wide and deep. it allows me to ask questions. it gives me opportunities for growth. i ask "why?" and scratch my head. sometimes, i find an answer that satisfies my curious mind. sometimes, i have to let my question sit and remain unanswered for a time.

this used to bother me. i thought i had to have all the answers or it proved that i wasn't strong enough in my convictions. but over the last couple of years (and specifically last year), i have started to embrace these questions as a way of bolstering my faith.

i wrote about how my personal faith and doubt mix and marry here. it's one of my favorite posts perhaps because it's one of the most honest posts i've written. (just so you know, being vulnerable and honest is really hard for me. it's much easier to write about my favorite flavor of ice cream or a cute puppy i saw but also less rewarding. every now and then i actually open up and share my heart. it's scary but really necessary).

i have been reading rachel held evans' blog for a while now. she is a self-proclaimed "skeptic, a creative, and a follower of Jesus, figuring out this journey of faith one shaky step at a time." i can relate. why don't you deal me in.

her writing is thoughtful, intelligent, and insightful. she is honest and funny. she features a wide variety of posts, articles and interviews from people of different faiths, political affiliations, sexual orientations, educational backgrounds, and religious denominations. she asks questions that many believers may be afraid to ask, but she doesn't stop there. she explores the answers, deeply.

evolving in monkey town documents the story of how she went from a someone with all the answers to someone with all the questions. it is specifically about how her faith changed and evolved, and i am very interested and excited to read her story. i have a feeling i'll relate to a good portion of her experiences. if you want to watch a short trailer of her book, head here.

i could go on and on about this topic in general, but instead i'll leave you with some jack johnson lyrics because i love him and love is the answer at least for most of the questions in my heart. (see what i did there?)

"and there were so many fewer questions when stars were still just the holes to heaven." -holes to heaven

bread and wine

{photo credit: me}

first comes first. happy new year! it would seem wrong not to acknowledge the new year since it's kind of a big deal and all. 2013 was filled to the brim with all kinds of experiences for me. it was last may when i started my "year of being brave" and even though it hasn't been a complete year since i put myself up to this challenge, i can say without a doubt that i've done just that. lots of bravery, courage, trying new things, saying "yes". i will eventually be doing a recap of sorts, so be on the lookout! hope you all had a fun NYE. here's to 2014!

and now on to the main event. book two of my christmas books.

bread and wine by shauna niequist

this book was going around the blogosphere like a crazy storm for a while. everyone was reading it. everyone was reviewing it. everyone was, like, so loving it. i'll be honest. the title alone proved to me that it was going to be a good read. bread and wine is one of the great gastronomical combinations the world has ever known. i didn't need to read a blogger book review to tell me that. i was on board.

however, for whatever reason, i started instead with one of shauna's other books, cold tangerines. i got about a page in and had to get a pen before i continued reading because this lady had some things to say. and these things were good. things about valuing family, yourself, and your talents. things about falling down but getting back up. about dusting the bruised pride off your hands and knees and trying again. her writing style was easy to read and flowed from one page to the next. she was self-depricating and honest about both her struggles and her triumphs. i liked this lady very much.

when i went to the storyline conference in nashville in october, shauna was one of the speakers. she was as i expected-funny, honest, pulled together. i tried to be cool about being in her presence, but the flash from my camera kept giving me away. i was audience member "totallyfreakingoutrightnow".

one of her speaking points really resounded with me. our past stories, if we let them, will hold us back from our future stories. huh. let me think about that. so, our past is important. our past is what has made us into who we are today. i am the product of my experiences, and that is crucial. however, when we dwell on what was, what used to be, what people said about us, our regrets, our mistakes, etc., we become trapped in our old stories and can't move forward. we can't make progress. it was such an "ah-ha!" moment for me.

this is a small example but a frequent one. i can think for hours and days and weeks about a stupid comment i made to someone in conversation. long after they've forgotten, i'm analyzing why i said what i said and how i would change my words if i could go back in time. it's so tiring. she explained what holding on to our past does to us but that we are capable of moving forward. hearing this brought a sense of calm liberation upon me: oh, ok. it can be different.

so, i said all that to say this: i am excited to start bread and wine. this book is a "collection of essays about family relationships, friendships, and the meals that bring us together." {source} it highlights the bond that exists between food and our personal relationships. (i have a personal relationship with my food, but i doubt she's talking about that). the book also features an assortment of recipes between its pages. one is called "bacon wrapped dates". ohhhh, now i understand what all the fuss was about. 

you can find out more about shauna here. 

nine horses

{photo credit: me}

book one of my christmas books.

nine horses: poems by billy collins.

mr. collins is my favorite. i was introduced to him in college by a boy i had a fleeting crush on, and, unlike this particular boy, billy caught and captured my full attention, reeling me in. he writes mostly about simple things, everyday occurrences, but the words he uses are so magical and vivid. he turns something like forgetting a book and walking back into the house to retrieve one into a philosophical quandary.

"i go back to the house for a book"

i turn around on the gravel 
and go back to the house for a book, 
something to read at the doctor’s office, 
and while i am inside, running the finger 
of inquisition along a shelf, 
another me that did not bother 
to go back to the house for a book 
heads out on his own, 
rolls down the driveway, 
and swings left toward town, 
a ghost in his ghost car, 
another knot in the string of time, 
a good three minutes ahead of me— 
a spacing that will now continue 
for the rest of my life. 
sometimes i think i see him 
a few people in front of me on a line 
or getting up from a table 
to leave the restaurant just before i do, 
slipping into his coat on the way out the door. 
but there is no catching him, 
no way to slow him down 
and put us back in synch, 
unless one day he decides to go back 
to the house for something, 
but i cannot imagine 
for the life of me what that might be. 
he is out there always before me, 
blazing my trail, invisible scout, 
hound that pulls me along, 
shade i am doomed to follow, 
my perfect double, 
only bumped an inch into the future, 
and not nearly as well-versed as i 
in the love poems of ovid— 
i who went back to the house that fateful winter morning and got the book.

see what i mean? wicked sweet. billy was the poet laureate of the US from 2001-2003 for good reason.  i hate to say his poetry is "accessible" because it makes me sound like a poetry snob or some polished highbrow, and i am far from it (you're not surprised). so, instead, i will say his poetry can be enjoyed without the use of a poetry concordance. this is something i appreciate. it's how i prefer to write poetry (when i do), and i think when you can write about something simple such as a rainy day or the shape of an orange, and keep your readers' attention, it is quite a talent.

check him out and read a few of his poems if you care to. i'm already more then halfway through nine horses, but i'll definitely be going back through and taking in a few of the poems more slowly.

do you have a favorite poet or poem? do you know of any poet whose style matches billy's? i'd love to know!

on my bookshelf

{photo credit: me}

i really love books and reading in general, but i confess that i am a serial book hoarder. i find books that seem interesting (read: the cover looks cool) so i buy them. and then they sit on my bookshelf for months and years and generations. it's a very bad habit and one that, as of late, i have been working to amend. it's my only new years resolution. nah, it's not even that because i don't make those. it's just something i'm trying to do. 

here is the stack of books that i am currently reading or at least really really close to beginning.

cold tangerines :  shauna niequist

the late, lamented molly marx : sally koslow

the reason for god : timothy keller

love is a mix tape : rob sheffield

if i am missing or dead : janine latus

stress point : sara francis martin

pour your heart into it : howard schultz

i'm nearly finished with if i am missing or dead, and it's been a great read. sad and eye opening because it's a true story but very well written and engaging. i want to finish a few of the others that i have previously started before jumping into the new ones so i can make a dent in my unread book collection.

does anyone else have a problem with this? i either start a book and then put it down for weeks at a time or i buy a "new" book (at goodwill), and it sits unopened, gathering dust?

"hello, my name is lacey, and i buy books only to abandon them."

that is my scary future if i don't do something about it now. closing my computer and opening a book.

one last thing though. what are you guys reading? fiction or non-fiction? cook books? biographies? how-tos? what's your favorite genre?